what was i thinking?

    So here we are in Montgomery AL. waiting until Tuesday to get my next load. We had all day to just relax and chill and do nothing and it should have been great but nooooo I showed up and all but ruined the whole entire day.'   
        the day was going great until late this evening when i got all pissy about something and yelled at her and it was for something small. So now i have made her cry once again and it seems that whenever i start to make progress in leading her through this life we have chosen i push her back and hurt her and it solves nothing.
    I cant for the life of me understand why i snap at the silliest things but that's just what i do. So if anybody has any ideas of how to stop that feel free to list them here. I'm all ears.
   All i know is that i have all but turned her away from me. She says that i haven't but this isn't  my first dance and i know when i have crossed a line and if i haven't crossed it im THIS close and its making me sick.
   On that note...wouldnt you like to see the coyote win just once???